didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
