as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
my poor anus
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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