i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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