At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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