it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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