so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
