Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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