But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
