i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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