He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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