just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
