Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
