so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
