i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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