Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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