He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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