i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
