i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize