Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
