East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
