ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize