not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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