margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Please don't give away my fajitas
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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