no, he came in my armpit
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
