ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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