Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
