BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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