It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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