What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Randomize