I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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