So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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