I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
You're earring is so big in my mouth
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
