I wish I could punch you in the face.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Dick very happy bro
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
