She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
