I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
