He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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