If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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