ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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