fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize