3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
