I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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