if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
