I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
BRING THE BAGELS
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
