All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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