So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
