he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
