would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
