hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
third nipple confirmed
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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