Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
