Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize