Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Terrible idea I love it
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize