At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
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